Freelancing is a Lonely Business…
Sometimes, that’s part of its appeal.
Perhaps alone is probably a better word than lonely. I’ve often wondered how people that write books together get on. I can’t see myself ever working with a partner, I think we’d spend more time arguing over single words, than actually telling a story. But maybe that’s just me.
Still, freelancing is in general, a solo affair. We spend our days sitting at our computer, either surrounded by motivating music at an ear-splitting level, or sitting quietly so that we can hear the muse. We may or may not think of ourselves as loners, but others often think of us as anti-social.
What do they know? In my experience, freelance work is the very opposite of anti-social. I’m constantly introducing myself to complete strangers, and then in the next breath, I’m telling them just how wonderful I am. Which has taken some practice.
The appeal of freelance writing for me was definitely the ability to stay at home instead of having to drag myself out to work. I live in a small seaside village about 40 minutes away from anything resembling a city.
It’s beautiful here. In the evenings I can often be found sitting in our outdoor spa, listening to the sea just a few meters away, and looking up at the stars in our pollution-free sky. Why the hell would I want to leave?
On the other hand, I’m aware that going too long without communicating with others is not good for me, it usually leads to a visit from my old arch-nemesis, Depression. So, I make sure I venture into town at least once a week and talk face to face with a human being that isn’t my husband.
But I’d rather not.
Don’t get me wrong, I like people. I like some people more than others, but I have nothing against them as a species. It’s just that my dog understands me more than a lot of people do. I have trouble with words, you see. When they come out of my mouth they don’t always sound the way I mean them to.
But when I write them down, I can explain myself perfectly well and I don’t find myself being confronted with those blank stares. Know what I mean?
Plus, I do a lot of interacting online. There isn’t a day goes by that I’m not messaging someone, commenting on a post or in a group, or even attending an online meeting.
Yes, I know, it’s not the same. But, it’s still socializing and it still counts. So there.
Why It’s So Difficult to Talk to Other People
Think about it. When you go out and about catching up with people, socializing, what do you talk about? Your work. It may not be all you talk about, but it’s a big chunk of it. And the problem with freelancing is that the 9–5’ers just don’t get it.
They think you’re unemployable, not fit to be seen in public, or have some kind of disability that means you can’t get a real job. The idea of choosing to work from home, alone, all day, every day, just freaks them out.
And if you’re anything like me, you get really tired of trying to explain it to them.
Which is why I find it so much easier to socialize online. With other people who like to socialize online. I still have the real-life chosen few that I would walk over hot coals to spend time with, but as for dealing with the general public? I’ll do my talking with my fingers thank you.
And I’m sure I’m not the only one that feels this way. It’s not just the geeks that are chatting online nowadays, we all know someone who met their spouse online, or their best friend, or even their therapist. It’s far more socially acceptable.
Which Brings Me to My Next Point.
Isn’t It Fabulous When You Meet Someone Online That You Just Click With?
There’s a special kind of buzz that happens when you meet someone from across the other side of the world who gets you. Whether it’s a fandom, a lifestyle, or a career choice, it’s just nice to not have to explain yourself, so you can get on with talking about whatever it is that connects you.
Even your nearest and dearest don’t always get it, do they?
Last Sunday evening, at about 9ish, I closed my laptop, looked across the room at my husband, and said “Fabulous. It’s taken me all weekend but I’ve finally finished my pre-launch page for my Indiegogo campaign for Wordage!” I then sat back and waited for him to say something supportive.
Nothing. Not. One. Word. He did not even lift his stupid head from his stupid game on his stupid phone.
So, I started supporting myself.
“Oh, good for you Dear, well done. I know how important Wordage! is to you and your crusade to eradicate Depression from this world. And I’m sure you’ll find plenty of readers and writers who want to join your online community and help to mentor younger writers. And I know…”
He finally lifted his head and said: “Come on, Dear, you know I don’t understand all that interweb stuff!”
Sigh.
See what I mean?
It is vitally important to the survival of the freelance writer’s species, that we connect with each other in our happy place. Online.
Check this out and let me know what you think:
